justine-scott

Let’s play Catch-up. This is my least favorite thing to do.

Where should I start? I guess I’ll go back about 6 months.

The past:

I was a senior in high school and I decided to graduate early and get out of Indiana. I’d always planned on not going to college and moving right on to the mission field. Turns out the farthest I could get at this time was Kentucky, my sister goes to seminary there and said I could move in with her and rent my room and bathroom. So this is what I did… in order to stay on my mom’s health insurance I enrolled in community college, took out a loan, and got a job. I never wanted to go to college because I know what I would be getting; I would have a great time, I know that. Why do something so easy? And also I just felt like I couldn’t wait. So I decided I might as well make the best of it and have a great time. Classes were amazing and just fanned the flame. I met some really incredible people. I failed journalism (I never went) and I fell in love with my Peace and War Perspectives Class. That was my college experience.

During this I prayed for a job. There’s this coffee house and café’ called main and maple, in a bigger town about 10 minutes away, where college students and random people come to use the internet and chill. I applied and they said come back and apply in two weeks, I came back in one and I got the job. The only explanation is God’s hand. I had no experience and honestly no one ever get’s hired there.  So work was good and all the people were about 10 years older than me but so cool. My sister has a new boyfriend, Adam. He’s in Jerusalem for a couple weeks and then is moving to Texas a couple weeks after he comes back. Also one of her best friends just moved to Texas. I asked Justin and JD, guys I work with, if we could be friends and JD said… “You’re 18 and I’m 26… it’s not like we can hang out.” Just another time my age worked against me.  So the loneliness set in and tears flowed because I forgot how hard it was to make real relationships. But I started getting used to being alone and reviling in my reclusisty. Over the past couple months Justin and JD have started to come around. Justin and Charis have invited me over to hang out and watch movies and I went to Pasca with them and basically they are what I’d been praying for.

Lately:

I haven’t been hearing God in the way that I’m used to. Usually He’s given me dreams or signs or spelled it out for me, but now… nothing.  I read my Bible all the time and pray and just hang out with Him throughout the day but seriously… silence. Sometimes I feel his presence and it’s so obvious but mostly I feel like he isn’t there. Over the last Few Months I’ve been praying and asking Him what’s next for me, asked for direction… nothing.

Last week. :

Jaqi and I were in the car talking about stuff and she let me know that the lease was up in September and that she was planning on transferring to a seminary in Texas. This would’ve been useful information earlier. This gives me 2 months to find some loosely compiled excuse for a plan.

Now:

 I just need to figure out what I’m gonna do for the next 6 months to a year. So I’ve asked a couple of my incredible friends who are growing and becoming incredible young women of God to pray and we are going to meet within the next week and try and narrow down anything. Or just hang out. I’m thinking God is just waiting for me to use the knowledge and resources he’s provided me with to take the next step.  So that’s something I have to deal with.